Brewstew – El Dentist

Brewstew – El Dentist Okay, I hate the dentist, you hate the dentist Everybody hates the fuckin’ dentist A few weeks ago every time I woke up
my mouth just killed me It drove me crazy It felt like Shawn Michaels It felt like Shawn Michaels
would just dance his way into my room And just Sweet Chin Music me
right in the face, every morning So I go to the dentist This place is right between a pawn shop And, like.. a strip club The assistant comes in, she’s like: “Okaaay, I’m gonna put my fingers in your mouth..” “Aand then I’m gonna scrape them
with this big metal sickle” “Aaaannd then you’re gonna pay off” So I’m laying there, while she’s scraping me
with these Freddy Krueger claws and she’s like: “Okay, let’s get some x-rays” They throw this heavy-ass vest,
that’s completely made out of lead, and I’m like: ‘What the hell is this for?’ And she’s like:
“Oh, it’s to protect your body from the x-rays” So I’m sitting there, looking like
I’m in a Jason Statham movie with my bulletproof vest on And all I can think about is the shit ton of cancer
that I’m getting with every picture she’s taking She comes back into the room, she’s like: “Awkay, let’s take a look at those pictures
of your cance.. I mean your teeth!” She tells me
my one wisdom tooth is coming in sideways It’s practically doing
a somersault in my goddamn head Basically, it looks like this All my teeth look great They’re all hanging out, you know
they’re watching scrubs And they’re fuckin.. eating nachos All of a sudden this guy, right here He’s all like: “Hey guys, do you mind if I’m.. you know..
try to act like an asshole?” “Uh.. I don’t know, that doesn’t really sound like..” “Yeah, I’m gonna be an asshole anyways!” So I schedule an appointment
and get them taken out the next week So for a whole week I’m Courtney loving it On ibuprofen, while the Heartbreak Kid
whoops my ass every single day When I finally get to the dentist, I’m like: “GET “GET IT “GET IT OUT OF ME!” ‘Cause I was about to be ‘Cause I was about to be Tom Hanks ‘Cause I was about to be Tom Hanks in Cast Away And take it out with a goddamn ice skate So the plan was not to put me under But to dope me up enough so I that couldn’t
really remember what the hell happened to me So I start falling asleep, which is good That’s what happens to most people They fall asleep and they take ’em out
and they never even know what happened They don’t even remember anything But I wake up right when they start And I And I remember And I remember everything they did! I remember the sound of my tooth I remember the sound of my tooth
just crunching I can remember the drill, I can remember the blood His foot was on my head for leverage! And I felt like my head was gonna explode At one point he looked directly
at my eyes and saw them open And he didn’t say a damn thing. And the ironic thing is.. Is I don’t remember anything after that I don’t remember the car ride home The last thing I remember
is them wheeling me out in a wheelchair With a prescription of Vicodin And I’m just like.. “Duuuu ai look.. hhheavy naaauuu?” So $800 later I’m left with a bloody mouth And a traumatic experience At least they gave me the Vicodin Because I can probably sell it
to a lady at Kmart for half my money back

Author: Kevin Mason

100 thoughts on “Brewstew – El Dentist

  1. I was awake for both of my bottom wisdom teeth 😂😂

    Not gonna lie, I cried like a bitch for 5 minutes when I got into my car 😂 like wtf. I can handle breaking bones, surviving near death experiences, pulling glass out of my feet or whereever else, falling down hills and other crazy shit. But never once cried over them until the day to get my two bottom wisdom teeth removed and cried like a fucking bitch 😂😂😂😂 of ALL things it was two god damn teeth. FML lol

  2. In Switzerland there are not many dentist would use N2O, or i just dont found one using it.

  3. I mean,you might be able to sue them.Just the surgeon,because he looked straight at you and didn’t care.

  4. I wasnt put under when i got my wisdom teeth out either. I remember them cutting me open and going "oops guess you need more medicine." What was worse was one of my wisdom teeth was on a goddamn nerve. So basically I felt it a lot more than the others and was kind of painful. Thanks wisdom teeth.

  5. I had all 4 of my wisdom teeth taken out at once with just the numbing meds! I was on a soft food diet for weeks

  6. Stop being a bitch the military took all 4 of mine and i was wide awake and walk back to my company in a fucking snow storm

  7. Baffeling how much Anericans overuse Drugs. Had the exact same thibg with local anestetic, just half my face fell asleep, nothing else!

  8. I’ve been through this 3 months ago. Except I had 2 teeth that was crooked. It was THE worst pain EVER!! And I was definitely fucked up after the surgery.

  9. Dude I rather take the dentist than a haircut I hate haircuts so much and this is what I resemble it's of torture 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

  10. I got all 4 of my wisdom teeth pulled the same day. Being knocked out by that gas is great. The pain hit me like a truck an hour later.

  11. I went to the dentist to get medal teeth (I font know why) I went to sleep and I woke up and they were still putting the medal teeth on me. it was when I was 5 or 6 years old .,.

  12. YouTube 2013:you heard brewstew

    Other youtube persom:yea but let's not reccomend his new videos

    YouTube now:hey let's recommend him now

  13. I remember getting my uppers removed and I apparently:
    1. Pet a handicap sign.
    2. Tried to order a milkshake via Walgreens drive through.
    3. Pet my nephew like a dog and called him "fluffy boy".
    4. Called my sister in law Mary ((its marie)).
    5. Wished everyone merry Christmas.
    6. Proceeded to chew through my lip…

    I still have one lower left…

  14. I don't hate the dentits I'm getting horny cuz it feels so good when they put their hands in my mouth and just do what they want

  15. Fun fact the cracking noise you hear when they pull out your wisdom tooth if your awake are actually all the blood vessels popping 👍

  16. Whats funny is all the dentists and hospitals in oklahoma they all take like 30 xrays no protection then your eyes are killing you cause they always start with no warning at all

  17. Just had this surgery on me today on August 9th, 2019. First they put laughing gas on me and made me feel numb, then they put the IV in and made me fall asleep. The next thing I remember is the dentist and his assistant packing up their stuff and my mom and three cousins wheeling me into the car. And then now I’m typing this. At 1:24pm on August 9th, 2019.

  18. Anesthesia awareness is a bitch. I woke up in the middle of neurosurgery once. Still get nightmares 25 years later lol. I have to laugh about it now

  19. You never go to sleep and your eyes don't close when you go though sedation dentesy. You're just really drugged up.

  20. I remember i was having some thing done to my teeth once, im not fully sure what they did cause i was put to sleep, but i think they were filling a few cavities. The first dentist i went to didnt put kids my age to sleep and they were gonna just ignore my panic and work on my mouth anyway but i was shaking alot and crying before they even called my name and they knew they couldnt work properly with me already dying. So they sent me to another place where they knocked me out with a heck ton of gas. When i woke up i was soo fucking dizzy, im not kidding i felt like i was gonna puke and i couldnt lift my head cause it felt like my head was 100000 pounds heavier than my body. They had to awkwardly get me into a wheelchair and wheel my out to my car where my mom basically had to hold me like i was a ragdoll to put me in the car. I fell asleep in the car and woke up still pretty dizzy. For the next week id randomly grt dizzy cause i could smell the gas in my nose still

    And even after all that the only thing i was concerned about was of the kids in the waiting room got scared after seeing them wheel an almost dead looking 12 year old to her moms car.

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